Motherhood and Overwhelm: Don’t Do Everything Yourself

Last year, I had an epiphany that our family only had a few summers left before our boys would go off to do their own thing. So I spent hours researching, brainstorming, and putting together a list of fun things to do to make sure we’d all have a memorable summer. On a hot Saturday afternoon, I decided it was time to put my plan into action.

I suggested going to the lake with all the inflatables, having a barbecue, and spending “quality time” by the lake. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. All they wanted to do was hang out in the backyard instead. I was crushed and upset, feeling like no one cared about my efforts to make a special summer. Why is everyone just so ungrateful??

It wasn’t until I spoke with my coach (yes, we all need help and support, even moms ❤️) that I realized I had made a critical mistake. I hadn’t shared my plans or the intention behind it with my family. They had no idea how much it meant to me or how hard I had worked on it. So, I sat down with them a week later and shared my vision of a magical summer, and they were all excited to help make it happen.

This shows that no matter how rewarding motherhood is, it can also feel overwhelming and unappreciated. As moms, we often carry the mental load for the ENTIRE family (including all the pets and plants and everything else …) that can be difficult to manage (to say the least!). But it doesn’t have to be. So, take off some mental load and next time make sure to:

Plan with (not for) your family: Instead of taking on the burden of planning all on your own, sit down with your family and talk about what activities everyone would like to do. You’ll be amazed at how enthusiastic they are to be involved!
Create a “seasonal bucket list”: To make planning easier, create a seasonal bucket list where everyone gets to pick three things they want to do. In our case, there’s a total of 12 things for the whole family to enjoy! Whatever we don’t get around doing, we move on to the next season or the same season next year.

Here’s the magic that will happen:

Everyone’s invested: By having each family member choose their own activities, everyone is invested in the planning process. They’ll feel like they have a say in what they’re doing and will be excited about the things on the list.

Turn “planning burden” into “planning fun”: This means you won’t have to do all the work anymore! Everyone chips in and if your kids are old enough, they’ll be able to do their own research to figure out how to make their activities happen.

Flexibility is key: You might not be able to do everything on the list in one season, but that’s okay. Just move any unfinished activities to the next season or the same season next year.

Have fun together: Even if there are activities on the list that some family members aren’t initially thrilled about, everyone will still enjoy doing them because they know they also have things they’re excited about.

So what are you waiting for? Try our tips and watch the magic happen! It has made a huge difference in our family, and I’m sure it will in yours too. Start planning your seasonal bucket list, and get ready for all the adventures you’ll have together!